Hallie Batchelder On "Extra Dirty," Dating Older Men & Sexting Advice

Hallie Batchelder is teaching me how to sext. “You have to invoke the five senses,” she says, leaning back in the booth at Little Ruby’s in New York City’s West Village. We’re sipping spritzes on the coldest day of winter so far, and the 27-year-old is looking chic as ever with her long red manicure and slicked-back pony. I’m wearing a baseball cap with the words “sex ed for all” stitched across the front, a sartorial choice curated for this lunch outing — but in this scenario, I’m the student.

“There’s a statement, supporting argument, and ending, then you send the text,” she says. “That’ll really get things going.” The Boston native laughs when I tell her most people aren’t naturally all that good at this. “Maybe I should write a book.”

She’s always been a storyteller, she says, though she never expected it to pay the bills (she has her dad’s credit card for living expenses anyway). Since starting her TikTok last year, Batchelder has built a following of 400,000 for her unhinged FaceTime-style story times. “I was just saying sh*t,” she says. “I started posting like everyone was my friend, and now I’ve developed a little community with inside jokes about my life.”

There’s the morning-after debriefs about first-date sex. There’s the dirty martini tutorial in the glass she “whipped out of Lucifer’s crotch.” There’s the catch-ups with her dad, aka the “credit card canceller” (so far, his threats haven’t actually resulted in card cancellation, and he’s racked up plenty of fans in the comments). “You get one drink in me and I am telling you my whole life story,” Batchelder says. Case in point: the viral drunken confessional where she recalls having anal sex after eating oysters.

If you’re thinking “Wow, that’s a new one,” you’d be right. No one is doing it quite like her. While Batchelder never thought of herself as an influencer — “I was just treating TikTok like my private story” — her content caught the attention of United Talent Agency in March, along with podcast giant Alex Cooper, who signed Batchelder to her Unwell media network in June. After a six-month wait, Batchelder’s Unwell project is finally here: Her podcast Extra Dirty debuted on Dec. 5, accompanied by an interview on Call Her Daddy the day prior. In the first episode of her show, Batchelder demonstrates a hogtie with a microphone cord — so it’s safe to say she’ll be going all in.

You can't say anything I haven't already said about myself.

We’re talking the morning of the CHD episode drop, and Batchelder hasn’t watched it yet because she remembers the chaos of that conversation, filmed in Los Angeles in mid-November. She takes a long sip when I mention her comment about Scott Disick being in her DMs — it made the episode. “She kept that one in there?” I tell her Cooper bleeped out some other names, so that’s how I know Batchelder must have said some real sh*t.

She laughs. She’s generally not worried about the internet’s reaction to her. “You can't say anything I haven't already said about myself,” she says. “If someone says I have way too much lip filler, I’m like, I’ve already said that. You can’t get to me.” She reads her DMs and comments, even the cruel ones from men. (“They're beta males who are just mad they could never get a hot girl in their life.”) The one place she won’t go is Reddit: “It’s probably the worst. Reddit should be illegal.”

Even if Batchelder gets canceled — which, if it happens, she hopes it’s for doing “something interesting,” she says on her podcast — she can always go back to living the charmed life she had before. Since graduating from Boston University in 2019, she’s been spending her time between NYC and Nantucket, working hosting jobs and hanging out with her friends. “I don't think corporate was ever meant for me,” she says. “I mean, picture me in the corporate world crunching numbers.” (I certainly can’t see it.)

Now, she’s fully integrated into New York’s influencer scene, hanging out with other popular creators like Halley Kate McGookin and Paige Lorenze, two other Gen Z women whose dating lives are often the subject of gossip. “It’s interesting to see your friends get hate online knowing actually how they are in real life,” she says. “There are so many discrepancies. I have a group of influencers here who I really, really like.”

Batchelder has been single since college, and she’s not looking for anything serious. “I’m pretty content just doing me,” she says. “There’s no one to report to, no one’s going to ask me why I’m in Miami.” But never fear, she’s still dating for content. She’s told her followers so many stories about her exploits with older rich men (including one who took her to his friend’s private island in the Bahamas) that I take the opportunity to ask where she finds them. She lists a few bars — Zero Bond, The Nines — before landing on “friend’s uncles.” “Have you really?” I ask. She smiles. “Yes.”

The key, she says, is to avoid the “elevated frat bro who thinks he’s still in college” and instead go for “the guy that was maybe a little nerdier in his early 20s, and now he's aging like fine wine.” In general, she doesn’t approach men. “I don’t chase, I attract. That’s the motto.”

Her most viral dating moment thus far came in September, when she was papped hanging out with a certain former Netflix heartthrob and ended up on DeuxMoi. Batchelder asks that I don’t name him but is happy to talk about it. “I've never really been in that situation before, so I was caught off guard. I thought we were a little more under the radar,” she says. “But honestly, even though that situation didn't work out, at least I was on DeuxMoi. I was fine. I looked good. My face looked snatched in those photos." I tell her I’m fully confident she’ll make it on the gossip site again. “We’ll be on it together,” she says. (I have no business being on there, but I’m rooting for her.)

Hangxiety fears me.

Right now, Batchelder is pouring her energy into the podcast to capitalize on this momentum. “I have five episodes in the bank,” she says. “It’s nice doing something I genuinely enjoy doing. To be able to be yourself unapologetically, I feel like that is my passion.” The wild nights and drunk texting will continue — it’s what her audience wants to hear about.

But does she ever get hangxiety or an oversharing hangover? “Hangxiety fears me,” she shrugs. “I actually once leveled up and sent a voice memo to my ex-boyfriend. We haven't talked in years and I sent him this really mean voice message ripping him to shreds.” She deleted the text the next morning — her go-to move. “My girl math tells me it never happened,” she says. “He replied the next day. He thought I'd be like, ‘I was so drunk, I didn't mean that’ but I was like, ‘I'm going to die on that hill.’ I meant every word of what I said.”

There’s a family sitting next to us at one point, then another duo who seem curious about the recording device sitting on the table while we drink and talk sh*t about men. But Batchelder isn’t pressed. “You can ask me whatever,” she says — and it’s not an act; I can tell she means it. This is a woman liberated from the shackles of other people’s opinions.

“It's really never that deep,” she says. “When you’re drunk, no one's really paying attention to anyone besides themselves unless you're making a massive scene.” Even then, she could turn it into content. “That's my brand.”