Jessi & Jordan Are Still Determining If Their Marriage “Needs To End”

Spoiler warning: This post contains spoilers from The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Season 4.

Jessi Draper is happily getting out of the hot seat in The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Season 4. The show’s third installment focused on Draper’s affair with Marciano Brunette and its repercussions in her marriage to Jordan Ngatikaura. Season 4, out March 12 on Hulu, switches the focus back to MomTok’s group dynamics and Taylor Frankie Paul’s Bachelorette prep — giving Draper and her relationship a much-needed break from the spotlight.

“Last season was really rough for us, so I was totally fine not having that be the center point,” Draper tells Elite Daily. Still, Season 4 does touch on some contention for the couple. The possibility of divorce still looms over both of them, as Draper decides to go by her maiden name and later discovers that her prenuptial agreement was never signed by a witness (potentially invalidating it). It’s an emotional time for the couple, as they work through their issues without a clear end goal in sight. “You don’t just heal in a month. It’s going to be a process,” Draper says of the evolving challenges they’ve navigated on the show. “Anyone in a tough marriage can relate.”

Below, she gives an update on her and Ngatikaura’s current status, how she feels about DadTok, and her takes on MomTok’s latest friendship drama.

Elite Daily: This season, you took a lot of steps toward building an identity separate from Jordan, but you made it clear you didn’t feel ready to file for divorce. What is your status now?

Jessi Draper: We’re in the same place. We’re seeing if we can make this work or if it needs to end. We’re both doing individual and couples therapy and learning a lot about ourselves. Hopefully, it’ll continue, and then we’ll know the right answer. But right now, we’re just committed to raising our kids and trying to make this work.

The biggest thing was making sure that I gave it my all before making a decision. That doesn’t happen overnight.

ED: In the show, you brought up some issues with your prenup, which could invalidate it. How did it feel to discover that?

JD: I was definitely super emotional. I’ve already been through a marriage where I didn’t have a prenup, so that’s why I got one the second time. It was hard to know I might have to go through this again and have it affect my family and business. I wasn’t making that decision about divorce yet, but it’s good to be prepared, and it was scary to see that it may not go the way I need it to.

ED: Generally, are you pro prenup?

JD: Yes. I think it’s so important to do it, and do it the right way.

At first, DadTok would make funny videos ... then they started taking it really seriously, and we were like, ‘Oh.’

ED: Jordan was very focused on DadTok this season, giving some of the MomTok women pause. What was your reaction to his constant comments?

JD: I felt the same way as the girls. At first, DadTok would make funny videos, and it was lighthearted. Then they started taking it really seriously, and we were like, “Oh.” It kind of became MomTok versus DadTok, like an unspoken competition.

ED: You got into a little tiff with Mayci Neeley over hosting her book event, and some people in MomTok questioned if you were prioritizing opportunities over your friendships. What’s your response to that?

JD: I could see why they thought that, without the context. But Mayci had always told me, “Hey, no big deal if you can’t, but if you want to still do this, let me know.” She knew that the Unwell event [the Las Vegas stop of the Unwell Tour, hosted by Alex Cooper] was important to me. I was open with her that I really wanted to do it, but was not sure. It was never just like “screw you.”

The minute I found out she was upset, I was like, “It’s not even a question for me. I’m going to do my friend’s thing.” I don’t think fame was a factor, but I totally understood why they felt that way. I’m just glad that Mayci felt comfortable voicing her opinion, so I didn’t make the wrong decision.

All season, we were like, ‘Let’s just get Taylor to The Bachelorette.’ That was our main goal.

ED: Your friendships with the other girls really came into focus this season — whether you were calling out Taylor for some misdirected anger pre-Bachelorette or supporting Layla Taylor when she opened up about her eating disorder. How do you feel about how these relationships were portrayed on-screen?

JD: It was pretty accurate. All of us are so close now that it’s like a sister relationship. When one of them is struggling, I want to be there to help. But when someone’s making a mistake, we’re going to give it to them straight — sisters can handle that. We’re going to have little arguments, but we always come back together. At the end of the day, we love each other, which is why we get frustrated.

ED: How did you feel when Taylor left for The Bachelorette?

JD: I was so grateful that she got on the plane. We were nervous there for a minute, but I was happy that she was able to go and immerse herself in the experience. All season, we were like, “Let’s just get Taylor to The Bachelorette.” That was our main goal.

ED: Who do you consider yourself closest to in MomTok?

JD: Mayci and Mikayla [Matthews], for sure. They’re my ride-or-dies. During my affair in Season 3, they were there for me, and we got super close. They’re two of my best friends.

ED: Other major life updates were happening this season that you weren’t fully aware of, like Mikayla and Jace deciding to separate. Did you have any idea that was going on?

JD: No. I knew they were struggling, but I had no idea until we wrapped filming. Watching it back, I was just so heartbroken for her and him. It’s a hard situation because neither of them are wrong; it’s just how they feel. It’s so brave of them to share it.

The disagreement was between Jen and Whitney, and sending a husband in your place is not the move. But I also think it was great TV.

ED: At the end of the season, we saw Jen Affleck and Whitney Leavitt’s friendship blow up with a fight breaking out in the middle of glam. What was it like, seeing that happen IRL?

JD: It was crazy because it came out of left field. We knew there was some tension, but they had been close. So we were like, “Oh, what happened?” Whitney got heated because she was upset, understandably. I think they were butting heads over the miscommunication of it all.

Those situations are always interesting because we’re all in the background, like, “What do we do?” The worst is when they try to include you, like, “Well, don’t you think this?” And you’re just like, “What do I do? What do I say?”

ED: What’s your response to Whitney’s conversation with Zac?

JD: If Jen wasn’t ready to talk to Whitney, maybe she should have just said, “Hey, I need another week. I just got eliminated. I’m emotional. Let’s talk then,” instead of sending Zac. The disagreement was between Jen and Whitney, and sending a husband in your place is not the move. But I also think it was great TV, and I loved watching it.

ED: We stopped seeing Demi Engemann this season. Have you seen her at all since?

JD: No. I haven’t talked to her since the reunion, actually. That was the last time I saw her, and I’m fine with that. It made filming the rest of the season a lot more peaceful for me. Who knows what the future holds, but I do think it was the right move.

ED: We don’t see as much about JZ Styles this season, except for your Boss Babe award. Can you give any updates on how work has been?

JD: We always have fun things going on. It’s busier than ever. We’re launching our shampoo and conditioner and our updated hair care line soon, so stay tuned.

ED: How do you balance your work and filming?

JD: It's really hard to juggle the show, kids, and JZ. But there’s a season for everything. When we’re filming, everyone at JZ knows I have to take a step back. My priority is the show during those 10 weeks. When I stop filming, it flips. I always feel overwhelmed, but I’m also just so grateful. Google Calendar is my best friend.

This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.