Sabrina Filled Her Holiday Special With The Horniest Lyrics Ever
She loves a well-hung stocking.
Sabrina Carpenter always brings a little spice to every occasion — and yes, that includes the holidays. Ever since the pop star announced her A Nonsense Christmas Netflix special, fans knew Carpenter would be courting the naughty list rather than the nice one. Sure enough, A Nonsense Christmas is just about as filthy as a wholesome, family-friendly holiday special can possibly be.
In several songs throughout the nearly hourlong production, Carpenter flexes her unmatched innuendo skills with knowing little winks to viewers. Of course, there are purely sweet festive covers, too, where Carpenter reins in her sauciness to duet “This Christmas” with Tyla and “Last Christmas” with Chappell Roan. But it just wouldn’t be a Carpenter event without some silly sex puns — and it turns out, the holiday season gave the singer a lot of material to work with.
Over a selection of Carpenter’s original Christmas songs from her 2023 EP Fruitcake, to her own spiced-up parody of a holiday standard, here are the lyrics that really give A Nonsense Christmas that special Carpenter touch.
“Buy Me Presents”
1. “Drop every other ho ho ho / And put me on top”
2. “Drink me like a warm glass of milk”
3. “Keep my stocking filled”
“It’s The Most Nonsense Time Of The Year”
4. “Entendres are doubling / When I deck your halls / It’s the ho-ho-ho-iest special of all”
5. “If you’re hot and you’re young / And your stocking’s well-hung / By the chimney with care”
6. “You can watch with your aunties / I might mention panties / But don’t fret, it’s TV-14”
7. “You’re in luck, I’ve trimmed my tree just for you”
“Santa Doesn’t Know You Like I Do”
8. “All of this snow is falling / I could make you fall too / So tell me what’s on your wish list / I want to make it come true”
9. “Don’t you wanna wrap me up / And mistle-touch under the tree”
“A Nonsense Christmas”
